Can I Be Gay and Christian?

Author: ettie.v

Author Location: Germiston, South Africa

Short answer? Yes. You absolutely can be both gay and Christian.
But if you’re here, maybe you need more than just a short answer. Maybe you’re wondering because you’ve been told otherwise. Maybe you’ve prayed until your voice broke, begged God to change you, tried to date the “right” way, served faithfully at church, and still felt like your love for Jesus and your sexuality couldn’t live in the same room.
I want to tell you something upfront: You are not alone. There are millions of gay Christians around the world — faithful, worshiping, Spirit-filled people who are walking this road, just like you.

You Are Not Alone
I grew up in church and served in the Church for many years. I knew the scriptures and Christian songs by heart. Throughout my spiritual journey, I attended countless Bible studies, felt God’s presence in worship nights, cried over missionary videos, and wanted more than anything to please Jesus… I went to Bible school, got involved in ministry and even ended up on the mission field. But I also knew I was different.
When I tried to acknowledge I was gay, my first instinct was always fear. Not because I didn’t believe God loved people — but because I didn’t know if He could love me and if I could ever be acceptable to Him.
Would accepting I was gay mean I was turning my back on Jesus?
Over time, I discovered I wasn’t alone. There’s a whole community of LGBTQ+ Christians who are loving Jesus, studying Scripture, and faithfully serving God. Individuals who were gay, but also Christian, whole-heartedly serving Jesus.
If you’re wondering whether you belong in both spaces, hear this: You do.

Lies We Often Believe
It’s easy to internalize lies when they’re all around you. Here are a few many LGBTQ individuals struggle with — and maybe you have too:
Lie #1: God can’t love me because I’m gay
Truth: Nothing can separate you from the love of God (Romans 8:38-39). His love is not conditioned on your orientation. God doesn’t make mistakes — and that includes you.
Lie #2: God is punishing me because I’m gay
Truth: When difficult circumstances come across your path, it is not because you are gay — it is simply because we live in a broken and fallen world. Sometimes, life just happens – it is not God punishing you.
Lie #3: I have to choose between God and being gay
Truth: Jesus called you to love Him with all your heart, soul, and mind — including the parts of yourself you’ve been told to hide. There are no scriptures in the Bible that can accurately be used to condemn you for being gay.

Salvation Comes by Grace — Not By Being Straight
It is simple – one of the foundational truths of Christianity is this: Salvation is by grace through faith, not by works (Ephesians 2:8-9). We don’t earn God’s love by being good enough, straight enough, pure enough, or loud enough in our praise.
We are saved by Jesus—by His life, His death, and His resurrection. The gospel is for everyone. Including you. Including me.
So when the church adds extra conditions — like saying you must be straight or celibate for life just to be saved — that’s not gospel. That’s legalism. That’s a burden Jesus never asked you to carry.

A Personal Journey Toward Wholeness
For years, I thought being gay disqualified me from being a “real” Christian. I felt trapped by the Bible verses people used as weapons. I tried to change. I stayed silent in rooms where people said awful things about people like me—because they didn’t know I was one of “them.”
Eventually, I reached the end of pretending. I was tired of living a half-life. I began to seek Jesus with honest questions. I asked, not “God, how do I fix myself?” but “God, do You still want me?”
And God answered, not with a lightning bolt or a blinding vision, but with a gentle, consistent whisper:
“I have always and will always love you.”

The Bible, Faith, and Identity
Affirming your identity as LGBTQ+ doesn’t mean abandoning Scripture. In fact, it might mean wrestling with it more deeply. I still read my Bible. I still pray. I still love the church (most days) — though I grieve what it has done to people like me.
Understanding God’s word isn’t about weaponizing verses but about leaning into the heart of God—His love, His justice, His grace. And when I look at the whole story of Scripture, I see a God who draws near to the outcast, who loves radically, and who refuses to let shame have the final word.

You Are Part of the Body of Christ
Maybe you’ve been told you’re a disgrace to the church, a stumbling block, or an outsider. But let me say it plainly:
You are not a disgrace. You are a gift.
You are not an outsider. You are family.
You are not unclean. You are beloved.
The church needs your voice, your presence, your story, your gifts. You are not the exception to God’s grace. You are a living testimony of it.

You Can Be Gay and Christian!
You can be gay and Christian. You can love Jesus fully, serve His church, and live out your faith in truth and freedom. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.
And if you’re still wrestling with it all – still in the questions, still in the dark night of the soul – I want you to know this:
This season is an important part of the journey, and despite it being difficult: You are seen! You are not alone! God is not punishing you! His arms are still wide open!
You are loved!